Hello!

I’ve been away, lots of change, growth, ups and downs. Investing my time in creating…playing the guitar and learning to sing at the same time, learning how to draw and paint, trying to creatively restore life to the dirt in my care while it is constantly over-browsed by deer and other creatures. Grieving the loss of biodiversity and continuing to adjust my relationship to be more in alignment with life as it is.

I’ve done two open mics now, very challenging stretch for my nervous system. Ever changing orientation to everything I thought I knew about music, and forcing the release of my perfectionistic grip. Probably good for everything and everyone in my web.

Drawing and painting have been especially good for seeing everything anew. For cultivating interest and curiosity about the world around me and how to convey impressions.

And expression…I’m understanding the value of music and art for expression. Didn’t realize until these explorations the full extent of my trauma limitations to pretty much all my expression.

Another form of that expression is simply in posture. Not the way we usually think about it, but in simply the muscular strength required, and it’s been a whole process, stimulated by a chronic issue/injury, to discover and start to unwind the compensations, while being respectful of the form my body has relied on up til now, and acknowledging the limitations of age and aging.

We’re trying to make this house a home, and survive all the roller coaster ride that entails. So many disappointments, so many opportunities to practice communicating, expressing, adapting. Geesh.

I’ll write some more in a future post about how my understanding of the connections between trauma, nervous system, and environment and epigenetics is evolving. For now I’ll just tell you that consistent practices that manage your stress and cortisol levels is NEVER poorly spent time, energy or resources. It is truly essential to health.

I hope you’re all finding ways to smooth the bumps, and getting stretchier or growing calluses where you need to!

Love,

c